Taste Touch

During my four years of studying with the Gestalt Institute of Toronto, I heard one of the catchiest – and inspiring – phrases of my life (so far):

“Lose Your Mind and Come to Your Senses!”

This phrase is born from the idea that in order to live in the present moment, we need to stop ruminating about our past and to stop worrying about the future. In essence, we need to allow ourselves to get out of our heads – lose our minds – and become fully AWARE of our bodies and more specifically, our five senses: sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch. This also includes being aware of our breathing and any pain, discomfort or feelings present within our bodies.

This allows us to become more present – and in the present, there is no past and there is no future and therefore, we are not ruminating or worrying. There can only be a state of awareness and this is where we can do our most meaningful internal work.

It is interesting that in our society we are told we should not lose our mind – to lose our mind or our head infers that we are in a state of some irrational or uncontrollable emotion or that we have checked out of reality.

I don’t know about you – but sometimes doing just that, feels really good!

More often than not, however, we use food, alcohol, drugs or any number of external stimuli to help us get out of our minds and escape reality. So, how do we learn to achieve this state of being – aware and in the moment – without these stimuli and why is it important to do so?

First of all, I am not condoning or judging anyone’s need for these external stimuli – in a world like ours with so many stresses, it is no wonder that we feel we need these things. In fact, some of these things – in moderation – can help us to be more in the moment. A glass of wine every once in a while can relax us and allow us to enjoy our sense of taste!

Even after a lot of this type of training – and believe me, when I first began learning about being in the present moment, I was generally always in my head – I was struggling with being aware of my senses and therefore, being present. This was never so obvious until one day, I was having lunch with a friend in a little deli that was partly under renovations. We were engrossed in a very heady conversation when I realized that I had been leaning against the wall – more like framework with studs – for 45 minutes; and sticking out from the beam that I was leaning on, was a nail – the sharp end protruding out.

Had I really been leaning my arm against the sharp end of a nail for 45 minutes and hadn’t noticed? I thought to myself, ‘Oh my goodness, how numb am I to my own senses and how much pain can I actually take before I take action?”

Interestingly enough, another exercise that we did in our group training was holding our index fingers against someone else’s cheek and pressing in – the instruction was to do this until the person receiving the pressure told us to stop. While we did this, the person who was experiencing the pressure was to state – as best they could in this position, “I can take it. I can take it,” over and over. I took the pressure for at least 2-3 minutes without ever telling the person to stop. After the exercise, we were asked a series of questions:

1. How long did you take the pressure or pain?

2. If you did take it for a prolonged amount of time, what made you continue taking it?

3. Why did you take it at all?

This was one of the first revelations I had about my ability to take pain in my life; and my need to prove to myself and everyone around me that I can take it and how very strong I am. The most significant question that our leaders posed to us after this exercise, was, “why would you take this pressure at all, if at any given moment – the first second it started – you could have told the person to stop?”

What a question! Yes, why did we?

Why do we accept pain so easily and why do we – why did I, have something to prove regarding my own pain? It wasn’t that I was unaware of this pain, like I was with the nail – which was really more frightening to me as I had to wonder, how could anyone lean on a nail for 45 minutes and not be aware of it?

The exercises around this topic taught me that I was almost completely unaware of my own body. In fact, I was so unaware of my own internal pain that I had become numb to the things that caused me external pain and I had this stubborn need to prove to the world that I could take anything it threw at me.

The real issue with this is that as long as we remain numb to our pain; we often remain numb to joy and contentment as well. Hence, I have written blogs on depression and how it creeps up on us because of our inability to allow ourselves to feel our pain – our sadness or anger; hence, we end up not being able to feel anything – not even joy or satisfaction.

There are a few quick and effective ways to begin tuning into our bodies – ours senses – and they are well worth the time.

1. A quiet room: One of the things I do is sit in the sauna – this not only affords me complete interaction with my body in that I am sitting quietly allowing it to breathe and to sweat – I am usually completely alone and able to take the time to get in touch with how I am feeling emotionally and physically.

2. Sitting in or Near Water: Not everyone of course, has the luxury of having a sauna, but taking a hot bath or shower can work as well – anywhere there is water or the sound of water can be soothing and cleansing – being in water cleanses our entire chakras and aura. The sound of running water also affords us the luxury of tuning out external noises and distractions. Furthermore, the bathroom is great as it usually is the only room in the house with a lock on the door – especially if you have young children or anyone living with you that could be distracting.

3. Closing Our Eyes for 30 Seconds: You can do this anywhere – even at work. Close your eyes and check in with your body – from the top of your head, right down to your toes. You can simply do a mental scale from top to bottom or you can actually ask your body what it is feeling. The important thing is to become aware of any sensations within your body – good or bad – pleasant or uncomfortable – without judgement.

Notice how you are breathing as well. Once you become aware of your breathing, attempt to take in deeper breaths through your nose and out through your mouth. Some people are very uncomfortable with the idea of meditating or doing long breathing exercises – I totally understand this as I am still working on it myself – but even 30 seconds can ground you and bring you back to a state of peace if things are hectic around you or within you.

4. Go lose your mind: Exercise, run, play – do anything physical that can bring you out of your head and into your body. If you want, punch a punching bag or go into the woods for a walk and smash a stick against an old root – apologize to the root beforehand perhaps if you feel badly about it – and lose your mind. This is a great way to release tension, stress and anger that is built up. After you’re done, check in and notice what emotions come up. You might be surprised about what you get to finally release or whose pictures come to mind!

5. Massage: Whether you visit a massage practitioner or you simply ask for one from a partner or just massage your own feet, be sure to get touched at least a few times a day as our body needs to have this sense stimulated as it releases endorphins and it simply feels good.

6. Pet an animal: Petting an animal certainly is one way to become connected with your sense of touch. It also calms our breathing and usually while we are being stared at by big brown eyes or listening to the purring of a contented cat, we escape from our minds – and the stress of the day – at least temporarily.

Namaste – Peace Be With You!

Next Blog: What is Sensory Perception and How Do Our Perceptions Lie to Us?

Depression – Part 1 of Top 5 Series – Lifting Ourselves Out of It

Jan11

Depression is defined as:

1. Severe despondency and dejection, accompanied by feelings of hopelessness and inadequacy.2. A condition of mental disturbance, typically with lack of energy and difficulty in maintaining concentration or interest in life.However, Depression Doesn’t Exist!

Now that I have your attention and possibly your anger, please, keep reading!

For anyone who experiences depression or has come through it, the feelings associated with it are very real. However, one of the most valuable lessons I learned from my four years of Gestalt Psycho-therapy training was that depression in and of itself does not exist – it is a mental and physiological response to one of two things: repressed anger or repressed sadness.

Think of it as holding a ball full of air underneath the water. Everyone knows that it is difficult to do because the displaced air within the ball forces it to ascend upwards and we have to forcefully hold it to keep it under the water. When we do eventually let it go; it flies out of the water upwards proportionately to how deep we were holding it under.

This is very similar to what happens when we are holding anger or sadness within us – it wants to come up and be expressed – but we may not want to see it on the surface. The problem with this is, the more we repress our anger or sadness, the less we can actually feel joy or happiness. This is why it is crucial that we allow our anger and sadness to come to the surface so that our hands – and our entire being – is open to experience the joy and happiness life has to offer as well.

The fact that depression in most cases is a result of holding on to negative feelings – and negative energy – is very good news. While depression feels like a heavy weight upon our shoulders or quicksand that we feel powerless to become free from – anger and sadness are simply emotions that have been trapped within our bodies in response to an experience – and we can be free of them, which in turn will eventually help lift the feelings associated with our depression.

How do we do this?

I am certainly not going to advise for or against anti-depressants; but sometimes they can be a TEMPORARY solution to severe depression until we can process and deal with the sadness or anger in which we are holding. Times in my life that I have experienced depression I did not take drugs and I was able to work through it and come out the other side and that is what I want to share with you today. The truth is there is no quick fix to dealing with depression. If one is in this state, even affirmations and trying to lift our vibrational energy may not work – although they cannot hurt either!

Step # 1: We need to first identify what emotion is causing the depression – is it anger or is it sadness? And very often, even behind our anger lies sadness or disappointment over something that has happened to us. For example, if someone has said or did something very hurtful to us, we are likely to have felt sadness but masked it with anger very quickly in order to deal with it and ‘feel stronger’. Often we mask our sadness with anger in order to have the strength to stand up to or say goodbye to a particular person or situation in our lives. How many times have we thought we originally felt anger towards someone and then a few days later, realize that we are actually sad about what happened?

Step # 2: What are we feeling sad or angry about? The problem with trying to discover what and why we are feeling what we are is that many times by the time our bodies have gone into a depressed state, the actual original hurt or event has long since passed. It may even have been something in our childhood originally and has been triggered again by something in our adult lives.

So how on earth do we get to the heart of the issue and figure out how and why we are feeling this way? It isn’t easy. This is the step at which most people feel the most resistance – especially if the hurt did originate – and most do – in our childhood. We have buried it so deeply and so strategically in order to not have had to deal with it – usually because we were too young to do so or simply not equipped – that there are a few layers that we have to peel away first. It is necessary that we realize this is a process – and that is what I want to stress here – growth and healing of any kind is a process. When we cut our finger, our bodies have a wonderful – some would even say miraculous – ability to heal the wound. This does not happen overnight however; but we can apply ointments that expedite the process. This is where therapeutic modalities come in – they can include anything from journaling, talking with a friend, talking with a trained psychologist, E.F.T (Emotional Freedom Technique which I will be writing about in a later blog as part of this 5 part series), Reiki, Acupuncture and many more. You need to discover which one works best for you. In the meantime, I will share with you some practical techniques you can do in the privacy of your own home.

Step # 3: Writing to Heal

I have done this several times and I cannot stress enough how powerful – and effective – a technique it is to get at the heart of many of our repressed emotions and physical ailments. What we do is actually journal with the Depression – almost as if it is a person – or the physical issue – directly. Why not give it a try? If it doesn’t work then you haven’t lost anything; if it does, I would love to hear back from you as to how it helped.

Dear Depression:

You have taken over my body, slowed me down, made me feel lethargic and really awful some days. You must be doing this for a reason. Please, what is it that you are trying to tell me? What real emotions are you trying to hold onto for me? I know you are not my enemy. I know that you are attempting to protect me from my real emotions. Please help me to figure out what these are.

Take a few seconds and then respond from the Depression’s point of view – in other words, give it a voice.

Dear (Your Name):

Here is where you allow – freely and without judgement – your Depression (and you do not have to be severely depressed at all, you may just simply feel down or not so great) tell you what is really going on with you. You may be surprised by what it tells you or it may make a lot of sense. The trick is to allow it a voice.

This is the same for ailments in the body – another manifestation of repressed hurts, emotions or beliefs that have surfaced in a physical form. Please refer to my Blog # 17: A Disclaimer about Hemorrhoids and other Annoying Manifestations about this very thing. It does not matter if this is a small annoyance such as a hemorrhoid or if it is cancer. Our bodies are the mediator between our core inner self – our subconscious – and our minds. They are constantly giving us messages. When our leg falls asleep and we begin to feel pins and needles, our body is communicating to us that we need to move and stop cutting off the blood supply to our extremities. Why does it do this? To protect us. Why do our bodies develop “dis – ease”? Because we are “out” of “ease” with our true selves and our bodies want to return to homeostasis and ease again – and it will help us do this if we are willing to give it a voice.

Dear Hemorrhoid/ Dear Cancer: Again, allow yourself to be really honest about how you are feeling towards it. Maybe you hate your cancer or your disease. Tell it that. It can handle it because it is in your body to tell you something as well. Then let it.

Give your depression, anger, sadness and your pain – whether it be emotional or physical, a VOICE today. Let it communicate to you in plain language what it has been trying to tell you silently. Once you “hear” it – you may well be on your way to recovery and freedom.

Below is a website that delineates the Myths and Facts regarding Depression:

http://www.webmd.com/depression/ss/slideshow-depression-myths

Next Post: Depression – Top 5 Experts/Techniques Series – Deepak Chopra

Colour Lifts Our Vibrational Energy – Part 4 of Top 5 Video Series

Jan9

We all know that colour – and not just seeing it, but wearing it and even what we eat – can affect our moods and interestingly, can instantly increase or decrease our vibrational energy. How many of us have put on one colour in the morning and have instantly felt either that the colour was just right for our mood or it has made us feel uncomfortable and we have changed out of it?

This is an important message to listen to as our bodies resonate energy and so do colours – sometimes if we are resonating on a lower vibrational energy, we actually feel better if we put on a higher vibrational colour and sometimes, it might actually make us feel strange in that it doesn’t “fit our mood” that day. This doesn’t necessarily mean we shouldn’t wear it; but how do we know what message it is sending us?

Well, I have researched some videos on the vibrational levels of colours – above is just a fun outline of what colours can resonate about our personalities – but it has been scientifically proven that colour is simply a wavelength that contains and resonates certain vibrational energy. The best way to know what we should be wearing – and this is particularly important in colder climates when we are less likely to see colourful flowers or natural stimuli – is to educate ourselves first on how colour has been used throughout history and what each colour resonates vibrationally.

The video that I have included here – there are many worth perusing online and on YouTube – provides a good start in terms of educating ourselves about vibrational colour and adds a link for more information. In addition, while you read a little bit about colour and its vibrational energy; the colour and the music that is provided is very soothing which is an additional tool to balancing our emotions and helping us to feel more centred; therefore, helping us to resonate at a higher vibrational level. Remember, while movement is wonderful, sometimes sitting quietly focusing on what we are seeing and hearing and getting tuned into our senses can be a great way to lift our vibrational level – as long as what we are doing helps us to feel at peace or gives us an inner sense of joy – then we know we are resonating in a better field.

I would recommend that you do not click on the link unless you have a good 4-5 minutes – it isn’t very long, but to truly enjoy it and its information, you will want to take a few minutes – to spend viewing it. Enjoy!

Colour and our Subconscious: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWfsxn50GL4

Colour and its Vibrational Levels: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pkkcp4x0lMg

Next Blog: Top 5 Videos – Music and Powerful Affirmations Lift Our Vibrational Level

Exercises that Lift Our Vibrational Energy – Part 3 of Top 5 Video Series

Jan8

It is so important to feel good because feeling good and being positive about our lives is probably the number one key to attracting more people, experiences and things to our lives that continue to make us feel this way. But let’s face it, we don’t always wake up feeling good or come home from work feeling good. That’s why it’s important to do two things. #1: Make a list of the things that make us feel instantly better – only you can know what those are – as they are different for everyone – and keep the list handy so you can easily reach for it and remember it. It may be hugging your pet, having a cup of coffee and taking a few minutes to sit by yourself, or taking a walk. #2: We need to have an archive of resources that we can go to when we just can’t get out of our own funk. I have found that laughing at YouTube videos of funny animals or people is one of the quickest ways to help me do this. However, what if we are at work and this isn’t an option?

I found a video that comprises seven very easy techniques – some of which you could do at your desk at work or in the washroom – some of which I’m sure you would prefer to do in the privacy of your own home. Either way, I tried these techniques – in the video, Julia Rogershamrick demonstrates these techniques in a way that is easy to learn – and they actually work. Some of which you have to repeat but what I found was that they were easy to learn and to remember so that you can use them at any point during the day. Of course, different things work for different people, so do not get discouraged if certain things do not work for you right away or at all.

May your day be filled with great energy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXelgA53ZvQ

***Stay tuned for my next Blog # 28 for the Top # 3 inspirational and uplifting Vibrational Video.

Foods that Lift Our Vibrational Energy – Part 2 of Top 5 Video Series

Jan8

Similar to colour, music and images, food has an enormous influence on how we feel and our vibrational energy. As you have probably heard before, we are like cars; if we are filled with optimal fuel we run well. If we were to put sugar or oil in the gas tank; the car would develop major issues and probably become sluggish and stop working all together.

Our bodies are very similar. Now, sugar and oil on a moderate level is fine for us; but similar to cars, we need to watch what we use as fuel within our bodies. Our blood vessels are very much like the hoses within a car – once clogged, they are very difficult to get unclogged and sometimes have to be completely replaced which can be costly and well, not what we truly want to have to deal with. So beginning today, what can we do to feed our bodies and our minds the fuel it deserves?

The websites and videos that I have researched regarding food and and how they affect our vibrational level contain very similar information and warnings about what we should and should not be eating. I chose the website below as it is informative not only about what foods one should ingest for higher vibrational energy, but it also has a chart inclusive of the vibrational levels of food.

http://www.lexiyoga.com/vibration-of-food

There is also a video I have included and while it is really about losing weight by avoiding certain foods, it goes into much more details about what those foods are and why we should avoid them; it may be of interest to some people who have been struggling with their weight with little or no success. The video is somewhat long (but still worth listening to although at the end, they do try to convince you to buy their products) so I have condensed the portion of what they mentioned were the top five things to AVOID:

Top 5 foods (and drink) NOT to ingest:

1. High sugar foods/drinks that are processed such as any kind of concentrated juices – orange, apple, cranberry, etc. as the concentrating process actually removes the fibre and nutrients one would normally find in the fruit and leaves a high level of sugar. Without the fibre to balance the sugar level, our own sugar levels become raised when we ingest it in this form – this creates a false sense of higher vibration – or energy – and it is short-lasting and actually causes us to experience sugar crashes. Ingested on a long term basis, these concentrated and processed juices are the reason why so many people are developing diabetes – particularly type 2 diabetes.

2. Avoid margarine – and whenever possible eat butter. I have heard this said a number of times and the reason is that margarine is processed and has enormous amounts of transfat that our bodies do not breakdown and it ‘sticks’ in our bodies and our arteries indefinitely. This raises our cholesterol, fat storage and can lead to cardiovascular disease over time. Butter has fat too but it is a natural type of fat – naturally occurring in dairy products.

I once attended a conference on nutrition and the woman leading it stated, “If you can leave “it” out on your counter for more than 2-3 days and it doesn’t go bad; then you shouldn’t eat it.” This makes a lot of sense – can you imagine if it “sits” for days and doesn’t break down in the open air; what it does within our bodies?

3. Whole Wheat Bread, Pasta and other grains (cereals) – are extremely high in carbohydrates and also cause our sugar levels to increase quite quickly; while that is happening, they may “feel” like comfort foods but they also cause quick crashes – which cause us to feel shaky, hungry again or sluggish. However, these types of foods mixed with a proper amount of protein can be just fine for us. For example, if you are going to eat toast for breakfast, have peanut butter on it which has a high level of protein. If you eat pasta, have it with chicken or some other form of protein. This balances the sugar – and its vibrational level – keeping us feeling more balanced too.

4. Processed Soy or Tofu – again because of the same reasons above – due to being processed and having the nutrients and other healthier elements stripped from of it – which is very similar to any foods that are genetically modified – it causes the food to have a vibrational imbalance and therefore is not digested properly in our bodies.

5. Corn – Genetically modified corn is what the video was stressing to avoid – again, for the same reasons above.

This is all elaborated on in the following video: http://www.about.trimdownclub.com/introduction.html?ad=325

Now, the best part: What foods are good for our vibrational levels?

The guide regarding eating food with high vibrational energy is very close to what nutritionists tell us about eating healthy and helping to reduce the stress on the environment: stick to choosing our food from the outside isles of the grocery store. Meaning, choose vegetables, meats and whole grains that have as little packaging as possible. These foods are high in nutrition, low in packaging and as it turns out, they are the same foods that contain the highest vibrational energy. Think of an orange, yellow and red pepper – their colours are brilliant and usually if colours seem brilliant to the eye than they have a high level of energy.

So what other things should we include in our grocery carts? I couldn’t summarize it or write it any better than the website below so I am simply including it here for your perusal! Remember, you are what you eat; so you might as well make it high in vibrational energy!

http://www.livestrong.com/article/31289-list-higher-vibrational-foods/

Next Blog: Last of the Top 5 Vibrationally Uplifting Series – Songs

Next Series: How to “Lift” Ourselves Out of Depression

Positive Messages Lift Our Vibrational Energy – Part 1 of Top 5 Video Series

Jan8

If you are here it is because you would either like to find out more about Vibrational Energy or you would like practical methods in which to lift yours. Either way, I highly recommend you refer to my Blog # 14: Lifting Our Vibrational Energy to Bring About Manifestations which goes into more detail about some of the Top 5 ways you can lift your energy:

M.V.B.L.S. – Meditating, Visualizing, Breathing, Loving Thoughts and Sleep.

I recognize too that giving you the Top 5 Vibrational Lifting Videos (that I have researched and found to be the most uplifting) would be overwhelming, so I am going to blog about one each day of this week, providing a brief synopsis of why I chose each one. That way, if you want, you can choose to listen to one a day and give me feedback as to which ones really resonate with you and uplift your spirits.

# 1 Top Vibrational Lifting Video: I chose this one because not only does the music uplift me, but it encompasses many things in which one would want to manifest in their life while feeling great. I have found this one to be particularly positive. I hope you enjoy it , but please do not be afraid to provide feedback if you don’t. Your feedback about what you do or do not like is equally valuable. Disclaimer – the video does appear to be linked to the The Secret – you may or may not have liked The Secret or agreed with it, but I do think that some of the video posts in regard to many of its premises are useful. Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EmwlH-3L1Zg

Next Blog: Another Top Vibrationally Uplifting Video (which includes 5 practical applications you can try at home to help get you going!)

Lifting Our Vibrational Energy and Attracting All that We Desire – Part 2 of Top 5 Expert Series

Jan7

I am exploring the Top 5 Experts on how to lift our Vibrational Energy and thereby attract Love, Success and Prosperity to our lives. I also go into much more detail about this phenomenon in Blog # 14: Lifting Our Vibrational Levels if you would like to read more on this fascinating subject.

Top 5 Experts on Lifting Our Vibrational Energy:

1. What does Jan-Engles Smith (founder of the LightSong School of Shamanic Studies offering three accredited degrees in Shamanism – http://www.janengelssmith.com/) say about raising our vibrational energy and attracting more love and success to our lives: “It is in higher states of vibration that our divine essence thrives. The spirits have continually said that you must raise your vibration to be healthy, conscious, and aware. The higher vibrations are above the densities of much of human experience — the densities of doubt, fear, jealousy, revenge, sorrow, powerlessness, fear, disappointment, and judgment…Dream your new dream of reality and then be a match for it vibrationally by being enthused, motivated, excited, appreciative, passionate, and happy. Spend time envisioning your dream by engaging all of your senses. Create it (in your mind) and then FEEL so excited about this creation that it easily is drawn to you through the power of the law. If you do your part, this will happen. However, losing focus to this process commonly takes three forms. 1) A person feels too inadequate to make a difference. 2) A person focuses on what others are doing or not doing to help. The comparing is the problem, not what people are doing. 3) A person feels despair with this information, reviewing past behaviors, feeling guilty, unworthy, or depressed. These are low frequency broadcasts that just add to the problem. The moment is NOW. Make decisions for you to heal, to feel better, and to create a new reality.” 2. What does (did) Albert Einstein say about our Vibrational Energy: “Energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only be changed from one form to another.” Which essentially means that if you wake in the morning thinking and feeling negatively, this is only energy with a dark cloud around it…it can be changed by lifting that dark cloud by first stopping your negative thoughts – you can thank them for reminding you or telling you of something that you still need to address – and then tell them to go away. Then, begin actually thinking about things, people, events or even a happy memory that makes you feel better. This is changing your negative energy for positive energy which will automatically lift your vibrational level. “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving” (Einstein) Which brings me to my next point. Many people will tell you that meditation and sitting alone, quietly, breathing will bring you to a higher vibrational level. This is absolutely true. However, being a person who is in perpetual motion (and yes I do meditate but mostly in the bathtub as I seem to be able sit there alone, longer than anywhere else – and being in water actually cleanses your chakras and negative energy). I have found (and given myself permission) that moving is actually just as a useful and effective way for me to lift my vibrational energy, whether that be through exercise such as walking or a full-on work out or dancing. When I dance, I feel alive. I have made a point of dancing more in my home to high vibrational music, even while I sweep or vacuum (okay, what person hasn’t done this at one time or another) and making plans to go out with friends to dance. Dancing makes me feel more connected to my essential self than any other form of movement. I don’t know why – I just trust it. Since I was a kid who grew up on two acres of waterfront, I have run and jumped and skipped and that was always when I was happiest. If you are a mover and a shaker and would sometimes rather move than sit, dance than meditate, ride a bike than breathe deeply, then go for it! Einstein understood energy probably better than most and if he says to “keep moving” then I am willing to listen to his advice! Dance on people! 3. What does Oprah Winfrey say about Raising Our Vibrational Energy: Oprah has many wise quotations, but I am focusing on the following: “Surround yourself only with people who are going to take you higher.” (Oprah Winfrey) Oprah is not referring to people who have monetary success or prosperity that will take you higher in this manner – although she certainly might include these people – she means people who maintain a high level of vibrational energy and when you are around them, you feel the same way. I am focusing on this particular quotation because it is absolutely necessary that we do this. Often, we feel that in order to be kind or “a good person” and to keep our high vibrational level we must endure hanging out with people who are not so positive. I am here to give you permission to let go of these types of relationships and this type of thinking. There are two kinds of people who one needs in this world – they are the people we keep in our closest circle and the people who we keep in our outer circles. As I mentioned before in a previous blog, we cannot feed anyone if we do not make sure we are fed first or like the airline stewardess says before we begin our journey, “Make sure to put on your own oxygen mask before putting on that of the person/child next to you”. This wisdom is based on the premise that if we are not fed or have no oxygen for ourselves what possible good can we be to others? 4. What does Tanya M. Cooper (author of The Matriarch of La Bonita, The Wayward Daughters and the Radio Program, On Second Thought) have to say about raising our vibrational energy: It is absolutely okay and imperative that we keep in our closest circle only those that feed us, nourish us and provide us oxygen and space to breathe. You already know who these people are (and who they aren’t!) Our closest circle, (most likely the people who Oprah allows herself to be inspired by) feed us so that we can go out into the world (to our outer circles – and to her audience) and have the energy, patience and love to feed others. I have made it a habit to spend time with my closest, most positive friends over my weekends so that I am able to go into my classroom of adolescents on Monday and have more positive, constructive energy to pass on to them. What good would I be as a teacher if I spent time with people all weekend that drain my energy and then go depleted to my outer circles? I suspect this is what happens to a lot to people who dislike their jobs. It isn’t so much that they dislike their work, but that they already feel depleted of their energy and have nothing or very little to give and therefore get very little back out of it. If you want to raise your vibrational energy and feel good about your life and even those outer circle of friends and acquaintances that tend (most times it is not on purpose) to drain you of your energy, then be sure to fill up your tank with people who add to it first! Make a list today of the people who you feel feed you and your life and those who don’t. Then, I encourage you to make some decisions about who you are going to keep in your inner circle and those you will either put out into your outer circles (essentially spending less time with them or looking at them as people you can help after you are fed) and some you may have to say goodbye to permanently. That is your right as a human being – to be fed and have your oxygen first! You are not doing anyone any good if you are feeling drained or resentful about the time you are spending with them. They too can feel this lower vibrational energy from you – even though they will probably keep trying to take what little energy you have! 5. What does Brian Wilson (Good Vibrations – Beach Boys) have to say about vibrational energy: In the video below Brian actually talks about how when he was ten years old, his mother gave him a little advice about “picking up vibrations” and how later it became one of his band’s greatest hits. His intro in this video is well worth listening to about his reflection on this topic…or you can simply listen to the song or the lyrics because it in itself has a wonderful vibrational frequency and that my friends, is the key to attracting love or anything else you desire. Love really is the answer. Did you know that love is one of the words in our vocabulary with the highest recorded vibrational level? So go focus on the goals, activities, people and music that you love – it will surely attract more of it to you! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cEFEG3oVG10 (Brian Wilson of The Beach Boys) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pf6vVt0cLnM (LiveAid – using their song to help others!) And when all else fails, read your horoscope! : ) http://www.astrocenter.com/us/ Next Blog: The Top 5 Videos that can help to raise our Vibrational Levels when we just aren’t ‘feelin’ it!

How to Attract Love – Part 3 of Top 5 Expert Series

Jan6

First of all, as I previously mentioned in Blog # 19, love is within us and flows through us at all times. We do not need to look for it. The irony of searching for love is that the less we look for it and the more we extend it to our fellow humans, the more we attract it.

1. If you are looking for a loving partner, the quickest way is to become a loving partner and remind yourself every day of who you are and what is loving about you. Many times, we don’t really feel like we deserve love and so we attract people who give us just that – less than what we truly deserve.

2. Write down or think about all the things that you love – or maybe those people closest to you – love about you. Change your affirmation from “I am attracting a loving partner” to “I am a loving partner” or “I am love” and see what happens.

3. Throw out your list of what you are looking for in another person and write how YOU are already those things – we probably should not ask for anything from someone else if we are not able to give it ourselves.

4. Write a new list that includes the other person in it. For example, instead of writing “I want someone with a good sense of humour“, write “My partner and I have fun, laugh together and get each other’s jokes.” Include the person you want to meet in your list so that he/she also gains from the experience and will be attracted to come and join you in this wonderful, fun life of yours! I provide an entire list in my previous Blog # 10 Love: Self-Love Brings Every Kind of Love.

5. I have found that sitting around in my apartment on online dating rarely brings me the partner I am looking for – sure it brings me lots of dates – but I have come to the conclusion that if I am looking for someone who loves to ski, bike, be active, is funny and intelligent, I need to close my laptop, and get there and already be enjoying and doing those things myself.

I have joined skiing clubs, biking clubs as well as Organizations such as a Toastmasters Public Speaking group – not to meet someone – but because I love doing these things and the truth is when we are amidst the things we love and we are working from that loving and excited frequency, we will naturally attract more of the same.

If we are sitting alone in our homes on the computer trying to find love (and yes, some people have found it this way, although I suspect they are also out there in their community keeping busy at the other times) and we never go out, guess what? We will attract that same kind of person. I did. I attracted someone who, although he wrote in his profile that he travelled and skiied, he failed to mention that he hadn’t done either since he was in highschool!

So who are the top 5 Experts on Attracting Love:

1. Buddha: “Always be mindful of the kindness and not the faults of others.”

Buddha’s words are so true. I cannot stress enough that if you are constantly complaining (mindless) about your last date – or your last ten dates or hanging around with friends that are doing this, stop it now! To be mindful is to be conscious of how we are speaking because it directly correlates to what we are attracting. If we are focusing on what is wrong with us, wrong with people in general or wrong with the opposite gender, we are doing ourselves and others a disservice. None of this – not one word of it – attracts love into our lives.

What does attract it? Words of kindness, smiling, being positive about ourselves (even if we hate our thighs) and the world around us. Search for and find what is beautiful and loving in the world around you. If you have always wanted to attract a partner who brings you flowers, go out and buy freshly cut flowers for yourself. Do for yourself everything you imagine that a partner would do for you. This sends out loving messages to you, your world and to others and it will attract love far faster than anything negative you could possibly say. If you do have a negative experience and must vent, write a letter to that “bad date” and be done with it. Even when you share negative feelings about the opposite gender to your friends, you are also contaminating their energy field regarding love.

2. What Dr. Lisa Love (Best Selling Author – Attract & Keep Real Love) says of how to attract love:

“To attract love, you must be love. It’s true, most people don’t have love in their lives, because in truth they don’t know what love is. They confuse love for lust, infatuation, addiction, neediness, codependency, and even abuse. No wonder “love” leads to so much suffering and pain. But, it doesn’t have to be that way.”

3. What does Marianne Williamson (Author of the bestselling books The Age of Miracles and A Return to Love) say about attracting love:

“In the realm of thought, there are two main categories: thoughts of love and thoughts of fear. Every single moment, we choose between the two. If I think with love, then I am more likely to behave lovingly and to attract love from others. If my heart is closed, I am more likely to act out of fear. Fear-based behavior tends not to look like fear but like anger or jealousy; it elicits reactions from others that reflect my fear and not my love.”

4. What does Robin Mastro (an environmental designer and artist dedicated to bringing balance and harmony into people’s lives through ancient systems of wisdom) say about attracting love:

How to strengthen your relationship with Mr. or Mrs. Right using gems and stones. (From Making Room for Mr. Right by Robin and Michael Mastro). Gems That Enhance Loving Relationships :There are specific gems and stones that balance and support loving relationships, especially between you and Mr. Right. Some of the more common stones can be placed in the bedroom, in a small decorative bowl or in a saucer on your nightstand by the bed. You can create a collection of a variety of complementary stones, too. Stones can be purchased as larger pieces for display, or they can be worn as beads in a necklace, bracelet, or ring and kept on your Relationship Altar in your offering tray when you are not wearing them. Rose quartz promotes romantic love as well as self-love and acceptance.

5. What does Lori Deschene (Founder of Tiny Buddha and Tiny Wisdom eBook Series and worked for Oprah’s Life Class) say about attracting love:

The following are a few affirmations she includes in her website where you can view all of her affirmations about a number of topics, including finding and attracting love.

1. I know that to fill the love tank of others, I must first fill my own….Mine should be on overflow to have enough to share.

2. The point in sharing your life with someone isn’t to have them make your life better, but to keep you company as you do it yourself.

3. The energy we attract is what we subconsciously feel we deserve.

http://tinybuddha.com/blog/60-life-lessons-insights-from-oprahs-life-class/

***Even though these five experts offer very different methods and modalities for attracting love, they all say the same thing – first you must find the love within – the energy of love within you. Find compassion and love for yourself by not only saying loving things but doing loving things for yourself, like spending that money on the spa or for those activities you love and by helping others which sends out more vibrational love to the Universe, and will automatically begin to attract more of it to your life. Just remember that in the beginning, it may not attract Prince/Princess Charming – it may come to you in the form of someone from the opposite gender holding the door for you or smiling at you – recognize that it is a prelude of better things and return the favour! God bless you on your journey to love! Be comforted to know that you have enough love within you right now to fill up your entire room – if you tap into it.

Next Blog: Top 5 Experts on How to Lift Your Vibrational Energy Regarding Love and all your Desires) and what does Javier Bardem, James Bond and Skyfall have to do with any of it?

10 Things Your Authentic Self Has To Tell You: Love Yourself! Part 3 of 10 Series

Jan5

Have you ever kissed or hugged yourself? Did you know that doing these two things can actually open your heart chakra (http://www.healer.ch/Chakras-e.html ) and physically help you to feel more loving towards yourself and others.

We all know the “cliché” (it’s only a cliché because it’s true!) that in order to love others, we must first love ourselves. This is based on the premise that one cannot give what one does not have first. How on earth can we share a loaf of bread with others if we first do not make sure we reach out and accept this loaf of bread for ourselves?

Even Jesus understood this basic premise – he fed people before he preached to them because he knew he must first show his love (feeding someone is one of the most wonderful acts of love towards humanity) to his listeners and in return they would be open to his loving message.

However, how do we love ourselves when most days we don’t always feel that great about ourselves or our lives? I will end this blog with a great video by Louise Hay about how to begin feeling love towards ourselves and how to practice loving ourselves.

Top FIVE Experts on Loving Yourself:

1. Jesus said of loving yourself:

“And the Commandment is Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:31)

Of course Jesus was saying that we must love others, but most importantly he mentions that we must love them like we love ourselves which he understood is really the most important aspect of being able to give and receive love. We cannot give or receive love from anyone unless we understand what it is to love ourselves.

2. Jack Canfield (Chicken Soup for the Soul) on loving yourself:

“To truly love yourself you must cultivate honest self-awareness, unconditional self-acceptance and courageous self-expression. When you do this, you will experience true joy.”

3. The Buddha on loving yourself:

“You can explore the universe looking for somebody who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and you will not find that person anywhere. You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”

4. Debbie Ford on loving yourself (the good, the bad and the ugly):

“I think I would tell everybody that you have the right to love all of who you are. The dark and the light. The good and the bad. The human and the divine. The weak and the strong. The meanness and the kindness. The selfish and the selfless. That is why we are here. That’s real love. That’s learning to love. We’re here to learn to love all of who we are. When we love all of who we are, we love all of who everyone else is. It’s easy to love yourself when you wake up feeling good and you have enough money and enough health and all the things we look for. But is that even love? Our job is that stretch. How do I love myself when I’m broke, or how do I love myself when I feel insignificant, or insecure, or angry? That is our birthright. That’s when we return to wholeness. It is really the hardest thing a human can do – is to love all of one’s self.”

5. Louise Hay on Loving Yourself:

Louise Hay is the pioneer teacher of how to love yourself and in the video below you can listen to her explain about how important and powerful loving yourself is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uI0IvcjWSww&feature=player_embedded

***May you spend the rest of day feeling love for yourself – remember it is not so much a feeling, but a vibrational frequency that you can tune in to whenever you choose – dial into the Love Station 101.5 and keep it programmed in your mind!

Next Blog: Top Five Experts on How to Attract More Love to Your Life…

Love: What the Experts Say About It – Part 2 of Top 10 Series

Jan5

In this series, I am offering people Top 5 Lists of the best sites, authors, experts on topics such as love, relationships, affirmations, prosperity, forgiveness and healing techniques such as E.F.T. and reiki.

I am currently writing about LOVE, not strictly as an emotion or something we are looking for, but how it is a form of energy that exists within is, to be aware of this wonderful energy and how to tap into it on a regular basis instead of always looking for it outside of ourselves.

Who are some of the 5 best experts on love and what have they said about it?

1. Jesus

2. Dali Lama

3. Mother Theresa

4. Barbara De Angelis

5. Dogs (well, they are God spelled backwards)

What Jesus said of love:

“You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? (Matthew 5:43-47)

What the Dali Lama said of love:

“The definition of love in Buddhism is: wanting others to be happy. This love is unconditional and it requires a lot of courage and acceptance, including self-acceptance.”

What Mother Theresa said of love:

“Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired.”

What Barbara De Angelis says of love:

“If you aren’t good at loving yourself, you will have a difficult time loving anyone, since you’ll resent the time and energy you give another person that you aren’t even giving to yourself.”

What Dogs say about love:

“Love unconditionally and with unbridled passion!”

If you’d like to see a canine example, please click below!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXo3NFqkaRM

Enjoy!

Next Post: The Top Five Experts on How to Love Yourself