How to Attract Love – Part 3 of Top 5 Expert Series

man holding a door for a woman

First of all, as I previously mentioned in Blog # 19, love is within us and flows through us at all times. We do not need to look for it.   The irony of searching for love is that the less we look for it and the more we extend it to our fellow humans, the more we attract it.

1.  If you are looking for a loving partner, the quickest way is to become a loving partner and remind yourself every day of who you are and what is loving about you.  Many times, we don’t really feel like we deserve love and so we attract people who give us just that – less than what we truly deserve.

2.  Write down or think about all the things that you love – or maybe those people closest to you – love about you.  Change your affirmation from “I am attracting a loving partner” to “I am a loving partner” or “I am love” and see what happens.

3.  Throw out your list of what you are looking for in another person and write how YOU are already those things – we probably should not ask for anything from someone else if we are not able to give it ourselves.

4.  Write a new list that includes the other person in it.  For example, instead of writing “I want someone with a good sense of humour“, write “My partner and I have fun, laugh together and get each other’s jokes.”  Include the person you want to meet in your list so that he/she also gains from the experience and will be attracted to come and join you in this wonderful, fun life of yours!  I  provide an entire list in my previous Blog # 10 Love: Self-Love Brings Every Kind of Love.

5.  I have found that sitting around in my apartment on online dating rarely brings me the partner I am looking for – sure it brings me lots of dates – but I have come to the conclusion that if I am looking for someone who loves to ski, bike, be active, is funny and intelligent, I need to close my laptop, and get there and already be enjoying and doing those things myself.

I have joined skiing clubs, biking clubs as well as Organizations such as  a Toastmasters Public Speaking group – not to meet someone – but because I love doing these things and the truth is when we are amidst the things we love and we are working from that loving and excited frequency, we will naturally attract more of the same.

If we are sitting alone in our homes on the computer trying to find love (and yes, some people have found it this way, although I suspect they are also out there in their community keeping busy at the other times) and we never go out, guess what?  We will attract that same kind of person.  I did.  I attracted someone who, although he wrote in his profile that he travelled and skiied, he failed to mention that he hadn’t done either since he was in highschool!

So who are the top 5 Experts on Attracting Love:

1.  Buddha:  “Always be mindful of the kindness and not the faults of others.”

Buddha’s words are so true.  I cannot stress enough that if you are constantly complaining (mindless) about your last date – or your last ten dates or hanging around with friends that are doing this, stop it now!  To be mindful is to be conscious of how we are speaking because it directly correlates to what we are attracting.  If we are focusing on what is wrong with us, wrong with people in general or wrong with the opposite gender, we are doing ourselves and others a disservice.  None of this – not one word of it – attracts love into our lives.

What does attract it?  Words of kindness, smiling, being positive about ourselves (even if we hate our thighs) and the world around us.  Search for and find what is beautiful and loving in the world around you.  If you have always wanted to attract a partner who brings you flowers, go out and buy freshly cut flowers for yourself.  Do for yourself everything you imagine that a partner would do for you. This sends out loving messages to you, your world and to others and it will attract love far faster than anything negative you could possibly say.  If you do have a negative experience and must vent, write a letter to that “bad date” and be done with it.  Even when you share negative feelings about the opposite gender to your friends, you are also contaminating their energy field regarding love.

2.  What Dr. Lisa Love (Best Selling Author – Attract & Keep Real Love) says of how to attract love: 

To attract love, you must be love.  It’s true, most people don’t have love in their lives, because in truth they don’t know what love is.  They confuse love for lust, infatuation, addiction, neediness, codependency, and even abuse.  No wonder “love” leads to so much suffering and pain.  But, it doesn’t have to be that way.” 

3.  What does Marianne Williamson (Author of  the bestselling books The Age of Miracles and A Return to Love) say about attracting love:
“In the realm of thought, there are two main categories: thoughts of love and thoughts of fear. Every single moment, we choose between the two. If I think with love, then I am more likely to behave lovingly and to attract love from others. If my heart is closed, I am more likely to act out of fear. Fear-based  behavior tends not to look like fear but like anger or jealousy; it elicits  reactions from others that reflect my fear and not my love.”

4.  What does Robin Mastro (an environmental designer and artist dedicated to bringing balance  and harmony into people’s lives through ancient systems of wisdom) say about attracting love:

How to strengthen your relationship with Mr. or Mrs. Right using gems and  stones. (From Making Room for Mr. Right by Robin and Michael  Mastro).  Gems That Enhance Loving Relationships :There are specific  gems and stones that balance and support loving relationships, especially  between you and Mr. Right. Some of the more common stones can be placed in the  bedroom, in a small decorative bowl or in a saucer on your nightstand by the  bed. You can create a collection of a variety of complementary stones, too.  Stones can be purchased as larger pieces for display, or they can be worn as  beads in a necklace, bracelet, or ring and kept on your Relationship Altar in  your offering tray when you are not wearing them.  Rose quartz promotes romantic love as well as self-love and  acceptance.

Read more:

5.  What does Lori Deschene (Founder of Tiny Buddha  and  Tiny Wisdom eBook Series and worked for Oprah’s Life Classsay about attracting love:

The following are a few affirmations she includes in her website where you can view all of her affirmations about a number of topics, including finding and attracting love.

1.  I know that to fill the love tank of others, I must first fill my own….Mine should be on overflow to have enough to share.

 2.  The point in sharing your life with someone isn’t to have them make your life better, but to keep you company as you do it yourself.

3. The energy we attract is what we subconsciously feel we deserve.

***Even though these five experts offer very different methods and modalities for attracting love, they all say the same thing – first you must find the love within – the energy of love within you.  Find compassion and love for yourself by not only saying loving things but doing loving things for yourself, like spending that money on the spa or for those activities you love and by helping others which sends out more vibrational love to the Universe, and will automatically begin to attract more of it to your life.  Just remember that in the beginning, it may not attract Prince/Princess Charming – it may come to you in the form of someone from the opposite gender holding the door for you or smiling at you – recognize that it is a prelude of better things and return the favour!   God bless you on your journey to love!  Be comforted to know that you have enough love within you right now to fill up your entire room – if you tap into it.

Next Blog:  Top 5 Experts on How to Lift Your Vibrational Energy Regarding Love and all your Desires) and what does Javier Bardem,  James Bond and Skyfall have to do with any of it?   


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