Tag Archive | healing

Book Release: L.O.V.E. Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy

Book Release: L.O.V.E. Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy

LOVE CoverAvailable at:

www.amazon.com

http://www.tanyamcooper.com

www.floatingfreedom.com

http://www.publishamerica.net/product53922.html

Book Synopsis:

In order to attract our inner most desires, we must learn to change the stories of our lives. These stories—which are often a result of messages that were planted within our subconscious minds when we were very young, have become ingrained within us—creating fear, worry and anxiety—which often act as obstacles in our lives.

L.O.V.E: Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy is a compilation of reflections, theories and practical applications that help people to understand their ingrained programming and ultimately equip them with the power to re-program their thoughts, words, actions and change the way in which they approach their world at large.

If you want to be free of your limiting beliefs and begin to live the life you’ve imagined, open this book and delve into the wisdom and secrets of your own subconscious mind and become no longer a slave to your thoughts, but their master! Thereby, attracting more love, prosperity and success to your everyday life.

L.O.V.E. Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy

LOVE Cover

Available at

www.amazon.com

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/tanya-m-cooper?keyword=tanya+m+cooper&store=book

http://www.tanyamcooper.com

http://www.publishamerica.net/product53922.html

L.O.V.E. Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy 

Synopsis

In order to attract our inner most desires, we must learn to change the stories of our lives. These stories—which are often a result of messages that were planted within our subconscious minds when we were very young, have become ingrained within us—creating fear, worry and anxiety—which often act as obstacles in our lives.

L.O.V.E: Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy is a compilation of reflections, theories and practical applications that help people to understand their ingrained programming and ultimately equip them with the power to re-program their thoughts, words, actions and change the way in which they approach their world at large.

If you want to be free of your limiting beliefs and begin to live the life you’ve imagined, open this book and delve into the wisdom and secrets of your own subconscious mind and become no longer a slave to your thoughts, but their master! Thereby, attracting more love, prosperity and success to your everyday life.

Tanya M. Cooper’s Book Release – L.O.V.E. Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy

LOVE Cover

L.O.V.E. Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy

Synopsis

In order to attract our inner most desires, we must learn to change the stories of our lives. These stories—which are often a result of messages that were planted within our subconscious minds when we were very young, have become ingrained within us—creating fear, worry and anxiety—which often act as obstacles in our lives.

L.O.V.E: Live a Life Of Vibrant Energy is a compilation of reflections, theories and practical applications that help people to understand their ingrained programming and ultimately equip them with the power to re-program their thoughts, words, actions and change the way in which they approach their world at large.

If you want to be free of your limiting beliefs and begin to live the life you’ve imagined, open this book and delve into the wisdom and secrets of your own subconscious mind and become no longer a slave to your thoughts, but their master! Thereby, attracting more love, prosperity and success to your everyday life.

What’s The Secret, The Power & The Magic All About?

bth_the-secret-book

For some people, reading self-help books and trying to decipher the messages and information from them may seem daunting, overwhelming or time-consuming and I understand that.  As a teacher and writer,  I am very blessed that I am able to read, digest and summarize a lot of what I read and then pass that on to others.

In fact, to save on time of re-reading many books that I find valuable; as I read them, I highlight the important points and write the key ideas and strategies I want to remember on note cards in order to have them on hand at a moment’s notice.

For this reason, I am attempting to summarize for many, what Rhonda Byrnes is exploring and postulating in her three books, The Secret, The Power and The Magic.  I am doing this not to suggest that one should not read these books  or to suggest that I can truly summarize all of the research, work and the writing process that went into completing and publishing these books; but I can simplify them for people who may not have had a chance to sit down and read them for themselves.

Here’s how I would summarize each one thematically in the most simplest of terms:

 

The Secret:  Faith – Desiring and asking for what it is you desire in life and believing you will receive it.

The Power:  Love – Harnessing the Power of Love which is to think, speak and demonstrate through your actions, the high vibrational level of love.  Love encompasses compassion, forgiveness and appreciation and is the highest vibrational word in our vocabulary.

The Magic:  Gratitude – thinking, speaking and being truly grateful for everything and everyone we have in our lives right now and for what it is we want to manifest in our life.

Essentially, Rhonda explains that how the Law of Attraction works in our lives is dependant upon the feelings of desire we have for things, the love we express towards the things we want and the gratitude we have.  All of these things – the level of desire, love and gratitude for who we are, people in our life and the things we have now, is what is attracting to us what we have  NOW.

If our desire is to attract better situations, people and things to our life, we must express desire, love and appreciation on a higher level through our feelings.  This, in turn, will lift us to a higher level of vibration which is the very thing that is essential in order to improve our “Law of Attraction” to bring to us the things we want.

One of the key elements to remember is that The Law of Attraction is always working in our lives – it doesn’t matter how our lives are now – we should not be fooled to think that it is not working.   Whatever and whomever we have been attracting to our life is based on the level of vibrational energy we have been expressing out into the world from our thoughts, words and actions.

What we must do – and this essentially is “The Secret” is lift our vibrational energy to radiate more love, more appreciation, and more compassion and then the things that we truly love, appreciate and have affection for, will begin manifesting and being magnetized (and multiplied) to us.

Over the past ten years, I have written, spoken and acted upon many affirmations.  What I have observed is that the ones in which I felt the most love and appreciation for, have generally always manifested and manifested fairly quickly in my life.  Situations and people for which I have felt frustration have generally manifested just that – more frustrating people and situations!  It is IMPERATIVE that when we think, say or act upon anything we are desiring in our life that we feel a feeling of love and appreciation for it.

I have, therefore began to revamp my thoughts and affirmations towards the things that I love.  How do I know I love them? When I think of them, I actually get either a rush, goose-bumps, excitement throughout my body or a squeezing around my heart.  I choose to focus on the things I really love because it is those things that I obviously am really desiring if I feel a stronger, positive vibration in association with them.

For example, while I am grateful (being appreciative is just as imperative to manifesting) for the car I have, I absolutely feel love (excitement) towards the BMW x3 and say so on a regular basis.  I also spend a great deal of time visualizing driving it!

Each day, I have been writing in my journal and  writing an email to myself of the 5 – 10 things I love or love to receive.  I am determined and faithful that these very things will manifest in some form or another in my life at some point, while I am doing this each day.

The wonderful thing about living our life in this manner is that each day we can awake with an excitement of what big and small things will manifest in our life and especially how they will manifest themselves.

It is always very cool and inspiring to affirm that I love fresh-cut flowers (you can be as specific as you want – even naming the type of flowers you love) and a few days later, being given flowers by a friend or stranger.

This not only demonstrates to us the power of our words, but it is a physical confirmation that we can attract and manifest the bigger things in which we desire in our lives.

The only disclaimer I can write about this is:  Whatever we do, if the flowers (or whatever it is we have stated that we love), do not turn up in the time-frame that we would like, we cannot lose faith!  As soon as we doubt or become frustrated because the things we desire, do not manifest in the time we want, and we say, “See, this Law of Attraction thing doesn’t work!” we repel those flowers or the very thing that might have been five minutes away from manifesting in our lives.

This sometimes can be the most difficult thing to remember and to live out in regards to the Law of Attraction.  The Universe, as soon as it hears our desire begins to conspire to make things fall into place in order for us to receive it; however, it also hears our doubts, fears and worries and these will serve to block the vibrational level of attraction.  We must remain single-focused on what we want and be adamant that we WILL receive it. We must not be adamant about the when or the how.

Next Post:  How do we relax and KNOW that the things we desire will manifest in our lives?

Financial Freedom: Change Your Attitude! Part 5 of 5 Series

Prosperity stop complaining

Being Grateful is all about Perspective!

I have had some scepticism about the book, The Secret by Rhonda Byrnes – primarily because sometimes we cannot simply wish things into our lives and then receive them IF we have core beliefs that are acting as obstacles  – we must work out those beliefs first.

However, I am fully supportive of her book, The Magic, which has nothing to do with magic.  It has everything to do with what we already know: Demonstrating gratitude for the things in our lives, is good for us and can only bring more things for which to be grateful.

This post is simply to recommend to you to go out and purchase or borrow her book, The Magic. Or you can experiment with the power of your own subconscious and how it is connected to the Universe as I did:

I magically came across her book by putting it out to the Universe before I entered a second-hand store to look around,  I wanted to find a book that would provide some answers for which I was searching about attracting wonderful things – especially financial freedom – to my life.  The Universe honoured my request and I found the book within the first few seconds of scanning the bookshelves and I just knew it was the one to read.  I’ve read it and I don’t think I have read another book, besides Louise L Hay’s book, You Can Heal Your Life that has resonated as much with my spirit and what I believe to be true as The Magic did.

In addition, I got the book for a third of the retail price!  I love when that happens because that is an example of financial blessings being provided; and while being grateful for these first manifestations is what ultimately leads to our full financial freedom.  I dare you to go out today with a wish or request – something small enough that you can actually believe you may receive it – and see what the Universe sends you!

Have you made a list of the things you are SO grateful for today that you already have in your life?  It is the most effective way to feel good now about your life and to attract that financial freedom you want!

Financial Freedom: Gratitude is the Secret Ingredient in the Recipe for Success! Part 2 of 5 Series

Recipe for Success black scroll

Gratitude is the #1 – and most readily available – ingredient in the recipe for Success!  It is the biggest investment we can make in hoping to reap the dividends of life!

If you can think, speak or write – you can be grateful!  Gratitude is like the baking powder in most baking recipes.  It is the easiest and best way to make any form of bread, pastry or dessert rise and EXPAND and become bigger than its original size.  Hence, gratitude in its purest form – being truly thankful for the things that already exist in our lives – even if it’s the last dollar we have – is the most effective ingredient in the recipe for expansion of our success!

For example: 

If we have a job; appreciate it even more for all those right now looking for work.

If we have our health; rejoice in it for all those who do not.

If we have food on the table each day; give thanks before we eat it  and remember all those who are hungry.

If we have a friend, tell them regularly how grateful we are that they are in our lives – for all of the people who are alone in this world.

My father used to say to me, “when you feel down, never look up – look down.  There is surely someone who has less than you and would be glad to be in your shoes.”

There are many activities we can do today to help us to feel more grateful about our lives; and you know the wonderful thing about being grateful?  It helps us to feel so much better about our lives and often can lift us out of our blue mood – and this expansion of feeling and vibrational energy – not action – is what attracts more and more wonderful things.  Like attracts like.  When we send out gratitude vibrations, there is an energy that vibrates at a level that automatically brings more things for which to be grateful.

What are some Gratitude Attitude Activities?

I saw this on the Facebook page “Feel Good” and thought it was a wonderful idea:

# 1.

Image

#2.  Gratitude Journal:   Each day in your journal or you can purchase “Simple Abundance Gratitude Journal” by Sara Ban Breathnach which actually has each day already prepared for you to write the top 5 things for which you are grateful.  If not, then grab a piece of paper and begin writing today either when you wake up or when you go to bed about the 5 things you are grateful for that day.   Sara’s website:  http://www.simpleabundance.com/gratitude_journal.html

3.  Gratitude Affirmations: These are from my Blog # 3 “Gratitude Brings Changes in Attitude” for more reflection and information about gratitude.

Some simple gratitude affirmations are:

I am thankful for being me.

I am thankful for my loving pets.

I am thankful for the abundance I already have in my life.

I am thankful for the meal I had tonight.a

I am grateful for the job I have.

One thing that is very important if we are attempting to manifest new or better things in our lives, in terms of love, friendships, places to live, a car, or just about anything we desire, we must never grumble or be negative about what we already have.

A sure way to make sure that the Universe never provides us with a new car is to grumble about the one we have or complain about the home we have now, if we are searching for a new place to live.  We must find the beauty in what we possess now and begin to sit calmly in that attitude of gratitude.  

Gratitude is the one ingredient, if you decide to include it in your recipe for life and success, that requires you to really not do much else in terms of action in your life to bring about change.  If you begin to express gratitude and an opportunity comes your way, by all means, take action.  However, one does not need to strive, force or plow one’s way to success.  Gratitude, just like baking powder, will cause the expansion of what we already have to rise and become something bigger and grander! 

4.  Looking for Beauty:  Today, either while you drive to work, at work or in your home or community, make it your mission to look around and see the beauty in something and take a minute to be thankful for it.  It may be the beauty in the sunrise, a picture, a poster, a person, yourself in the mirror, a mother holding the hand of a child, or a flock of birds overhead.  Then make it a daily habit to see as much beauty in the world as possible.  Elizabeth Taylor‘s mother, while she was pregnant with Elizabeth made a habit of looking at beautiful things each and every day and often would gaze at lavender Violas and always claimed that was why Elizabeth was born with eyes the colour of lavender (bluish purple).

5.  Watch Gratitude Videos:  There are many gratitude videos on the internet – while some include affirmations of being grateful and then include manifesting statements, I chose one that simply had reminders of why it is important to be grateful in our lives – even in the times of setbacks.  It is easy to be grateful when things are good and when we are manifesting what we desire – true growth in life, however, requires us to feel this way even when nothing seems to be happening.  Maintaining gratitude will help us to sustain our faith in these times.

6.  Reflection:  At the end of each day, while you lay in bed, reflect on and choose ONE thing that you are most thankful for during the day and say “thank you, thank you, thank you” before you close your eyes for that ONE thing.  You will most likely awaken to a new day with many more things for which to be thankful.  How?  Because the Universe hears your gratitude and responds by expanding it while you sleep! 

Next Post:  Financial Freedom:  The next ingredient is breathing! 

Financial Freedom: The GOOD news about your BAD situation! Part 1 of 5 Series

girl surrounded by money

The GOOD news about your BAD situation! 

Are you in a state of discomfort in your life?  Have you been there for an extended period of time?  This could include a state of illness, debt, poverty, frustration, lack of love, failure – whatever it is, what you know for sure from your experience is that you have had enough and you want something better for yourself and your life!

This is the SECRET as to WHY we need to suffer in our lives – not because God or the Universe wants us to suffer; but because the Divine Intelligence of the Universe knows that until we are really uncomfortable with our circumstances, we will rarely – or never – desire or take action to move out of our comfort zone to better ourselves and our lives.

Ester and Jerry Hicks describe this phenomenon in their book, The Astonishing Power of Emotions in these words: “…you often see things (in your life) that you do not want.  And each time that occurs, a clarification of what you do wants erupts within you.  Occasionally the experience is so dramatic that you could clearly state, “I don’t want that! And I now understand what I want instead is…”

The Hicks go on to explain this phenomenon and its brilliance, in this manner:

“And so, whether you are consciously aware of your new expanded desire or not, desire is born out of the contrast you are living…for during that process of knowing what you do not want, the clear, expanded idea of what you prefer instead is born and your Inner Being (or the Source within you) turns its undivided attention to that new expanded idea!…The contrast that you would be living stimulates new ideas of improvement and expansion within you…the broader non-physical part of you would embrace the new ideas fully and would literally become their vibrational equivalent.”

It is this vibrational equivalent that we – or our Inner Beings – are always seeking because it knows that like attracts like.  If we are functioning on a vibrational level of poverty; our beliefs, thinking and actions will continue to create and attract more poverty.  If we undergo an experience like the one described above, we will begin to shift our beliefs, our thoughts and our actions – because we are really uncomfortable in our situation; ultimately shifting our entire vibrational energy to match what it is we do want – wealth, prosperity and success – and then ultimately begin to attract it.

Essentially, while we are comfortable in our way of thinking and acting we are not very inspired to change or become the better, more expanded version of ourselves that our Divine Intelligence knows we can be.  We literally have to experience the discomfort – and usually for an extended period of time – in order to want something new and better – a better us – a better life – in order to actually attract it and achieve it.

Disclaimer: Not all people who experience suffering or discomfort expand and go onto a higher vibrational level of success.  Some of us have to experience the same discomfort or pain a few times in our lives in order to overcome it and move beyond it.  Some never do overcome it, as they become victims to their suffering and continue all their lives to tell themselves and others the same old story of their lives.  In order to benefit from this particular secret of life we must be willing to change and we must have enough desire for a transformed existence of ourselves.

The good news is that once we make up our mind to change,  a miraculous thing begins to happen – the Universe begins to put people, ideas, books and all kinds of resources in our path to facilitate this growth.  I have seen this time and again in my life. I will be guided to go into a particular bookstore  or I will already be somewhere and I will be prompted to begin looking for something – it is usually just a quiet impression on my spirit.  Or, as what happened recently, on the way home after my car had a gas leak, I ended up walking beside a gentleman who is a manager of a spiritual store in my neighbourhood and we had a wonderful discussion about life, spirituality and making the most of bad situations.  Interestingly enough, just recently I made up my mind to explore my spirituality more, step out and make new friends and to make the best of any adversity – big or small – in my life.  Lo and behold, my car breaking down allowed me to do all three of these things at once!

What obstacles do you find yourself perpetually going up against?  What situation have you been struggling with for so long that you are SO ready to be free of?  This is your area of growth.  You cannot become greater in any area in your life – until like the Universe – you are willing to allow yourself to expand.

The irony is that we can only allow the very things we want by giving up the struggle – stop focusing on the negative or the lack in our lives.  Once we focus on the things we already have – and feel gratitude for them – then we will be going with the flow of abundance and be able to attract and allow what it is we desire.

Next Post:  How Gratitude leads to a New Attitude about Everything!

 

Money: How to Make it Serve You! Part 3 of 5 Series

girl surrounded by money

In What Area is Money Serving You?  In What Area is it Not?

Many of us struggle with money – or lack of it – now and then.  However, we do not necessarily struggle in all areas.  This is an important detail of which to take note.  For example, perhaps we are always lucky to land the right job at the right time; but we seem to always have an issue with having enough to pay our bills.  Perhaps, we are blessed when it comes to people paying for our dinners or other things we need; but we often have breakdowns with our car or other maintenance issues.  Maybe it’s that we are extremely lucky in winning money; but the next day, we have an accident and there goes the whole lot we’ve just won.

Why does this happen?

There is a reason why, in some financial areas we seem to thrive and in others, we are barely surviving.  The discrepancy between these areas is where lies our personal growth; and ultimately, our financial growth.  Our success is dependent on getting these areas healed and in order. 

For example, if money often seems to come to us easily; but then a few days later, our car breaks down and it just happens to be exactly or close to the amount we have just “luckily” received, chances are we have a subconscious, core belief that we either do not deserve the blessing we have been given or we do not truly believe that we are lucky or fortunate or that our luck will last.

We may be in a perpetual struggle between two conflicting beliefs because our father was always stating that he had the “luck of the Irish”, but we perpetually heard our mother say, “Oh, I just can’t get a break!”

We are often fed many misleading and negative ideas regarding money and finances and sometimes we’ve heard so many conflicting beliefs, we continue to create them in our adult lives. I don’t know about you, but this can be very tiring and frustrating! 

How do we break free of these beliefs once and for all? 

Sometimes, it is as simple as recognizing them, writing them down and saying to ourselves that we no longer need these beliefs and they no longer serve us.  At other times, if they are deep-seated beliefs or there is a great deal of emotion attached to them; it may require that we seek outside help from a psycho-therapist, spiritual healer, hypnotist or any other professional that can help us get to the bottom of these core beliefs.  The other very effective technique that can release triggers and blockages is E.F.T: Emotional Freedom Tapping Technique (please refer to my series on E.F.T on my right sidebar of my blog for more information regarding it)

Mediation is a key strategy at getting to our core beliefs, because it is in this meditative state between full consciousness and semi-sleep that we can send messages to our subconscious successfully.  Here are some key strategies to try within a meditative state:

1.  As I have mentioned in my other posts regarding this money series, watching and listening to subliminal training videos can be very helpful to begin our journey to financial freedom.

How to Think Like a Millionaire:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXPIVsDLRAM

2.  Harv T Ecker is another expert on changing our money blueprint or mindset by thinking like the rich, instead of from a poverty mentality:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PeNAGoFSqno

3.  Focusing on an item that is symbolic of financial freedom can also be very helpful. I have a picture of the type of car I am intending to own in the next few months and it happens to be a car that represents for me that I am in a very lucrative financial position.  I imagine driving this particular car into my family’s driveway, right down to taking my dog cage out of the car and seeing my family coming out and greeting me to have a look at my new car.  I currently enjoy and treasure the car I am driving, but I often imagine I am driving my new car when I am behind the wheel of my current one; I even imagine how much higher I will sit in the driver’s seat.

4.  Visualizing Exercises:  These are exercises regarding forgiveness and letting go of our parents’ beliefs about money and wealth, which can be very effective.  I have visualized conversations with my parents; they are asking me for forgiveness for teaching me their limited views regarding money; and I am forgiving them and accepting from them a wonderful gift that they are happy to bestow upon me, allowing me to be physically and financially free from their home and moving towards my financially free lifestyle.

5.  The key is to meditate on or visualize things that actually bring us into a state of feeling associated with owning or having wealth.  For example, when I imagine driving my new vehicle, I can actually feel the excitement and the joy of the experience.  If repeating affirmations about being a proud owner – (I am not limiting the Universe as to how it wants to bring me this car – or speaking over myself that I have to earn the money for it) – of this vehicle registers on a scale from 1-10 at about a 6, then actually visualizing driving it and feeling the emotions attached to the experience, puts us at a level of 9-10.  This higher level is what will cause our subconscious and the Universe to respond more effectively to our request or desire.

Check Out Tony Robbins “How to Breakthrough”:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc4rWleclXs

Next Post:  How to Create a New Blueprint for Our Money Consciousness. Part 4 of 5 Series.

Properity: 6 Steps to Achieve It! Part 3 of 5 Series

bth_red-roses

How to have Prosperity blossom in our lives:

Step # 1:   Keep it Simple – Choose one simple saying that encompasses where you want to be – look completely past all of the steps, perceived obstacles, fears or even goals.  Imagine the flower – not the growth.

“I am financially FREE to WRITE and TRAVEL.”  This is my FLOWER: What IT is I want to accomplish.

Louise Hay, Wayne Dyer and many writers and healers today believe that you must focus on what you want and then allow the universe to bring it in whatever way or manner it chooses.  As Louise Hay says, you plant seeds in a garden in order to have the flower, but you do not go out two days later and dig up the seeds to see if the flower is growing.  You simply trust that you planted the seed and you imagine the flower in its existence.  You looked at the seed packet, decided on the flower you wanted to blossom.  You bought it, brought it home, planted it and the only nurturing you have to do is to water it – which in essence is simply repeating your ONE simple mantra every day as much as you can.  Repeating it as many times as you can is tending to your flower’s growth.  Nature will take care of the rest.

Step # 2Envisioning the Flower – You can imagine all of the stages of its growth but most of us like to simply focus on the ultimate creation and its beauty.  Do this with what it is you want.  Imagine the flower in all its bloom – imagine your desire in all its bloom.  For me it encompasses me sitting in my Adirondack chair next to a man I love on my beautiful deck that leads from our waterfront home out to the lake on which we live for part of the year.  The other vision is sitting on a boat in the Caribbean doing the exact same thing for the other six months, but I include myself with my laptop writing my next novel.

Step # 3:  Appreciating the Flower  – probably the most important step in the process of manifesting is gratitude – for the things we already have – we are given more when we appreciate what we have – and to appreciate what IT is that we want AS IF we already have it.

“Thank you for a life of financial freedom to write and travel and enjoy my home on the water and my boat in the Caribbean and the wonderful love I have in my life!

Step # 4:  In the Meantime – between-the-seed-and-the-flower  time.  In the meantime, while we are envisioning the flower we’ve planted, we go along tending to the rest of the garden.  We do not neglect the rest of it for this one flower.  In fact, tending and weeding the garden will keep the weeds from suffocating our growing flower.  Be sure to tend to the things you need to – pay your bills, make right your wrongs, forgive people, don’t judge, help to make others’ lives better.  And be sure to weed things from your life – bad habits, negative friends or acquaintances, anything that brings negative energy into your life.

Step # 5:  Rejoice in the bud – when the flower first begins to poke its way through the soil and manifest itself in the physically visible realm to you – rejoice.  If you want abundance in your life and you are given a five dollar gift certificate or find a penny on the street, rejoice.  If you want love and you are asked out on a date, rejoice.  If you want a job and someone offers you a chance to make money – even if its something you may not like, rejoice.  If you want new friendships and a stranger speaks to you on the street, rejoice.  All of these are the tiny buds that are coming to the surface.  We do not cut off the bud just because it isn’t yet the flower – nor do we curse at it and tell it, it’s not enough!  Rejoice in the small things and greater things will be given unto you!

Step # 6:

Obstacles that can get in the way of us manifesting the things we desire most in life.

In reality, only ourselves and our self-criticism and limited thoughts and beliefs can get in the way of us manifesting the things we desire.  We need to immediately stop criticizing ourselves.  Next we need to begin to re-program our minds to think positively and lovingly towards ourselves.  Without this step, the other five are moot.

Next Post: Prosperity: Part 4 of 5 Series

10 Things Your Authentic Self Wants to Tell You: Accept Yourself – the Good, the Bad & the Ugly! Part 9 of 10 Series

Woman hugging herself

What does it mean to really accept yourself?

It means to be very truthful and clear about not only your best qualities; but also your worst and still love, respect and appreciate yourself!

The adage, “the more we resist, the more it persists” is absolutely true when it comes to the sides of ourselves that we really do not want to accept.  Hence, the more we try to suppress them, hide them, avoid facing them or avoid admitting them, the more we are destined to manifest them in ourselves and in our lives.

For example, many of us identify certain character traits within ourselves that we see in our parents and as soon as we become remotely aware that we may be like our parents (what we perceive to be the not-so-great-side), we so badly do not want to become them that we resist and deny these attributes.  Hence, that’s where many of us end up – acting just like one or both of our parents.

For example, if one of our parents was unfaithful in their marriage, drank too much or was abusive, we often swear to ourselves that we will NEVER be like this.  Ironically, this very issue will creep up on us and we will find ourselves in the same predicament in our own relationships – or we will attract a partner who acts out these behaviours.

It may not happen at first; but eventually it will.  This is often called a “mid-life” crisis – it is essentially that time in our lives when we can no longer suppress the feelings or judgements that we had in our childhood about these behaviours of our parents and they resurface in order to be worked out.

My advice is to work on these emotions now – to learn to accept that as part of the human species, we are capable of being unfaithful, an alcoholic, or abusive and to focus on the feelings and judgements – justified or not – we have around these types of behaviours.  As long as we are judging our parents or hanging on to unforgiveness for what they did to our family life or to us, we will inevitably follow in their footsteps or attract similar situations to our lives.

The other adage, “we don’t like in others what we don’t like in ourselves” is true as well.  Every time we critique or have a judgement about another human being, it is always wise to ask these questions:

1.  How are we like this person?

2.  How are we ______(insert characteristic here)?

3.  When have we ever ____________?

We will soon discover that at some time in our lives, we too have demonstrated this same behaviour as the very person we are judging.  Why?  Because we are human and if we share one inexplicable quality it is this:  the ability to make mistakes and not be perfect!

I highly recommend reading Debbie Ford‘s book “The Dark Side of the Light Chasers” which details how, in our pursuit to be perfect, better than others, not have any “negative” characteristics, we chase after the light – the positive side and all the while try to hide the fact that we have a dark side.  Consequently, this dark side continues to resurface within us and our lives and it is an un-ending treadmill we put ourselves on.  Her book also offers exercises on how to learn to accept all sides of ourselves – the good, the bad and the ugly.

Debbie Ford says this about getting to a point of really accepting and loving ourselves: 

“I think I would tell everybody that you have the right to love all of who you are.  The dark and the light. The good and the bad. The human and the divine. The weak and the strong. The meanness and the kindness.  The selfish and the selfless. That is why we are here. That’s real love. That’s learning to love. We’re here to learn to love all of  who we are. When we love all of who we are, we love all of who everyone else is. It’s easy to love yourself when you wake up  feeling good and you have enough money and enough health and all the things we look for. But is that even love? Our job is that stretch.  How do I love myself when I’m broke, or how do I love myself when I feel insignificant, or insecure, or angry? That is our birthright.  That’s when we return to wholeness. It is really the hardest thing a human can do – is to love all of one’s self.”

Here’s to celebrating ourselves – the good, the bad and the ugly!  Hopefully, after all is said and done and we have truly embraced the fact that we are NOT perfect, we can actually laugh at ourselves.  When we can forgive ourselves for our shortcomings and our mistakes and get back up and try again, we know that we have synthesized our dark side with our light and it will be much easier for us to shine from a truly authentic part of ourselves.

It will also allow us to be less critical and judgemental of others.  Let’s be honest, we never really feel good for very long when we judge others.  When we can accept others, warts and all – we know then that we have truly learned to accept ourselves too!

Link to Debbie Ford’s website and book: 

http://store.debbieford.com/product_info.php?products_id=9

Next Post:  10 Things Your Authentic Self Wants to Tell You:  Romance Yourself!  Part 10 of 10 Series…